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Fears for Baby Number 2

Nora's is going to be here in a little over two months! Every day that fact simultaneously thrills and terrifies me. Sometimes, I have these moments of "what the heck were we thinking!?"  We are finally getting a tiny bit of independence around here. Henry still doesn't consistently sleep through the night. He's more attached to me then I ever thought possible. But, I'm also so excited to meet Nora, and see Hen as a big brother, and baby snuggles! 

So, my fears for baby 2, which I hope you will all tell me are completely normal and will fade as soon as I meet the Wiggly-one... 

  • That Nora will be just like Henry as a baby -- I don't know if I can go back to months of colic, reflux, worry and high-needs. 
  • That Nora will be completely different than Henry and I'll have no idea what the heck I'm doing. 
  • I won't love Nora the way I love Henry. 
  • Baby girl diapers.
  • That Henry is going to lose it and completely hate the baby and me. 
  • Henry is going to smoother the baby with his love.
  • We're going to have problems nursing
  • I'll end up with a c-section. 
  • Henry will stop sleeping, and/or start having potty accidents
  • I won't be able to handle it all.
  • Morgan and I will never be alone again. 
  • I'll have to think about having more kids. 
I think that's it for now. Or all I can bare to list. I'm normal, right?!


I had my second baby 1 year and 10 days after my first. I have to tell you, every one of your fears are completely reasonable, totally normal, and will not go away completely. Nora might be just like Henry, and you will be able to look at how far he's come and know that there is light at the end of tunnel. She's more likely to be nothing like Henry, scare you to death, surprise you at every turn, and delight you forever. You won't love Nora the way you love Henry - you will have this entire new pocket of love for her that is equivalent in size and yet so completely different. Like loving him for that adorable little pouty face that shows up in all the pictures, and loving her because she's always smiling and never pouted about a thing :) Baby girl diapers - well, she might just pee on you more than Henry did - my girls did! Henry might lose it sometimes, but it won't be because he hates you, or the baby, and is highly likely to DEFINITELY smother the baby with love and will be close to the top of your list of things to watch for and love all at the same time. You may have to have a c-section, you may have problems nursing - or you may not. But what you certainly will have is a beautiful baby that will grow, the c-section that you MAY have won't last forever, the problems you MAY have nursing won't last forever (after all, that only lasts for just so long before they outgrow it, too), Henry might wake up times that he usually didn't, but look on the bright side - you'll be up anyway, so it won't be sleep lost :) Some days you will feel like you can't handle it all, and that is when Morgan will step in and (I'm sure) be a wonderful husband and daddy and help you carry the load - since you guys are unlikely to have alone time for a while, anyway. And eventually, after a few months, you will have a chance to be alone again - and you will enjoy it, have real conversation, and by the end of the night, have real conversation - about the kids. It's parenthood - it's what we do! After five, I STILL think about having more kids, still pray about it, still wonder if we are really *done* or not - and will probably wonder for a while. But while 'thinking about other kids', you get the blessing of snuggling the ones you have, too :) And when it's all said and done, the fears won't match the love, fun, and blessings that your two kiddos will give you - ones that you can't buy, and that nothing and no one can replicate! You will do wonderful! It won't be long now before we get to see a tiny new face on this blog, and for that - I am excited for you!
Sarah said…
I worry about some of these things and having #2 and I am not even pregnant! I am sure it is all normal and once she's here you will barely remember what life was like without her. I am thinking about you during this time. I am also hoping Nora will not have reflux and colic like Henry and my daughter Aubrey. That was the worst. I think that If I ever have another child that it couldn't be any worse than Aubrey was. So there is that shimmer of possibility too!
Thank you so much for all your insight! Seriously, you are so right.
Ha, we joke about that all the time. "She can't be worse than Henry!" but then that fear, of what if she is, starts to creep in!
Lindsay said…
I'm right there with you. The more pregnant I get, the more I remember my delivery and recovery with Ethan and worry. I also spend a lot of time worrying about him hating me and the baby. He's so attached to me as well and doesn't regularly sleep through the night. I know it'll all be worth it but, ugh, I totally feel you.
kelly said…
You know more now then you did with the first, so that helps! All my friends said it gets easier since you know what to expect. Also everyone says your heart grows with the second. If anyone can do it you can!
Kate_at_TAL said…
don't you worry about nursing... i gotcha covered! :)
There is a helpful experience for me. Although, I am not a mom yet. But I will bookmark this post for future. Thank for sharing

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